In conversations with friends, family, and colleagues of an older generation, I often leave with a mix of emotions—joy, sadness, frustration, sometimes even exasperation. These wise, experienced individuals share their stories, perspectives, and hard-earned insights. Yet, repeatedly, they express how difficult it is to speak freely in a world that seems dominated by “woke” sensibilities. Their language, choice of words, and beliefs, shaped in a different time, are often quickly branded as “un-PC” or dismissed with labels like racist, xenophobic, or gender-biased. Little consideration is given to listening, understanding, or reflecting on the societal backdrop of the world in which they grew up.
When older generations attempt to share their perspectives, they’re often shut down before they’ve even had a chance to explain themselves. This can feel disheartening and limiting, especially since their views are based on decades of life experience—experience that could benefit others if only they were given a fair hearing. But we seem to be living in an era of binary thinking, where views are either “acceptable” or “offensive,” with little room for the complexities that lie in between. It’s as if society has forgotten the art of respectful debate, replaced by a constant state of feeling offended or outraged.
A culture of dialogue—true, meaningful dialogue—seems to be fading fast. Conversations that once allowed us to explore and challenge each other’s ideas with curiosity and respect are now fraught with tension, often derailed by defensiveness and quick judgments. This polarisation has created a climate where people are reluctant to speak honestly, fearing their words may be misunderstood or weaponised.
But it’s through respectful debate that true learning happens. Debate creates a space where perspectives can be presented and tested, where ideas can be explored, questioned, and refined in an environment of mutual respect. In debating, we gain clarity on our own views, better understand the experiences of others, and have the chance to adjust our beliefs through exposure to ideas we may not have otherwise encountered. In short, respectful debate allows us to bridge differences rather than deepen divides, and to foster understanding rather than opposition.
Today, we must bring this lost art of debate back to society. We need spaces—whether in our schools, communities, or personal lives—where conversation is not about winning or losing but about understanding. When we can create intentional settings where people are encouraged to listen, reflect, and ask questions, we can cultivate a more resilient society that values depth and nuance over division.
In a society that often feels like a minefield of potential offense, rebuilding this capacity for genuine conversation is essential. This isn’t just about politeness or tolerance; it’s about opening up the possibility for true progress, bridging the generational and cultural divides that keep us from learning from each other’s experiences. After all, when we listen deeply and debate respectfully, we open ourselves to a broader understanding of humanity and create a society in which every voice, young or old, has the chance to be heard.